The Creepiest Things Hiding in Your DNA

In my free time, there is little I like to do more than search the internet for all of the bizarre happenings that haunt as well as amaze us all. Science, life, and the world are true joys, and when I find something that really hits my interests, I absolutely love to share it with the world.

Here is a small part from one of my most recently struck goldmines of interest;

Ancient Diseases

In the distant past, retroviruses picked up by our ancestors would occasionally find their way into the sex organs, and the newly virused-up DNA was passed along to their children. As a result of all this virus-laden boning, we modern humans have about 100,000 of these microscopic gate-crashers cluttering up our DNA. When you add in the assorted genetic trash they've left behind, more than 40 percent of human DNA is made up of ancient, sinister and almost certainly cursed viruses.
But these viruses can't do much harm today, right? Oh, how we love your unflinching optimism, rhetorical question, but you're wrong again: Tests on the cerebrospinal fluid of schizophrenic patients (that's science-talk for "the brain juice of crazies") have revealed unexpectedly high levels of a particular endogenous retrovirus. This suggests that the misunderstood mental illness is, in fact, a long-term side effect of a retrovirus that we all have inside us already. It's no good locking the doors, people; that crazy is calling from inside the house.

In people who are genetically inclined, this retrovirus can be "switched on" by a separate viral infection that occurs around the time of birth -- herpes, toxoplasmosis (aka Cat Zombie Disease) or even plain old influenza. Studies have found that babies born in winter months -- around flu season -- are at greater risk of developing not just schizophrenia, but bipolar disorder and multiple sclerosis later in life, suggesting that all three conditions might just be different reactions to the same retrovirus. Basically, if you catch a cold as a baby, you could end up building bombs in a shack to combat the lizard people who've infiltrated our government, and it's all thanks to the insanity that lives in everybody's blood.

Grandparent-Based Death Time Bombs

A study in Sweden revealed a strange pattern in a rural community that had gone through periods of both famine and abundance in the 19th century. The study found that the grandsons of men who'd had childhoods coinciding with abundant years -- i.e., the ones who had stuffed their faces with grain for a season or two -- had a life expectancy of 32 years less than the grandsons of those who had experienced famine, with the deaths caused mainly by diabetes, heart disease and presumably the shame of having extremely fat grandparents. Daughters with gluttonous grandmothers suffered a similar fate.

The Twin That You Murdered as a Fetus

In 2002, a woman named Lydia Fairchild submitted DNA tests for her three children as part of a welfare claim, only to have the results prove that genetically, she wasn't the mother. Since DNA is considered the gold standard of medical evidence, she was accused of somehow stealing the children, even after the poor woman gave birth to another "nonrelated" child right in front of a social worker. Finally, more extensive testing unlocked the mystery: Her ovaries had a different set of DNA than her bloodstream. In other words, she'd given birth to her dead sister's children. And then, presumably, she never stopped screaming.

Again, that's no fluke: In another case, a woman getting typed for a kidney transplant found out that one son was genetically hers, while two more belonged to her similarly dead sibling. A teenage boy being treated for an undescended testicle turned out to be carrying an ovary on that side from a twin sister -- as if an undescended testicle wasn't going to get him made fun of enough, now he's half ghost-woman as well? Jesus, screw you too, genetics. Chimerism is thought to be rare but also massively underdiagnosed, since it's undetectable outside of DNA testing, which doesn't happen to normal folks all that often. Potential symptoms can include slightly different-colored eyes, uneven skin pigmentation and waking up at night to find 'YOU KILLED ME' written on the bathroom mirror just before being strangled by your own reflection.

Article Source: http://www.cracked.com/